Trust Me Not
by kimbercurtis95
Summary: Remus never new Severus would ever mean as much to him when they met but he had been the only person to make him feel as human as him.


When Remus Lupin met Severus Snape, it was the most casual exchange of words he felt he'd ever had with anyone. Remus had found his way to a train car and when he realized that most were full, and he didn't want to sit in the same car as the two rowdy black haired kids that were causing a large commotion, he settled on one that only carried one boy. "E-excuse me," he said slowly, peering in, looking at the boy who seemed startled anyone had spoken to him, "would it be alright if I sat with you? There isn't much else to sit…"

"Oh…" the boy looked a little startled and he nodded slowly, sitting up, straightening his posture. He gestured to the seats in front of him and Remus, giving a grateful smile, walked in and put his trunk up. When he turned around, he held his hand out to the boy and smiled again, nodding.

"I'm Remus Lupin. It's nice to meet you!" The other boy looked at Remus and after a second, he shook the other's hand and smiled just a little.

"Severus Snape. It's nice to meet you." Remus was pleased with the response and he settled in his seat, hands in his lap.

"I'm really excited to go to Hogwarts. Everyone in my family has been, they all loved it. We weren't really sure I was going to be able to attend, but—" his words fell off and he felt his face redden just a little as though he'd said too much. Luckily, Severus didn't seem to notice. In fact, Remus wasn't quite sure Severus was listening until he nodded slowly.

"I'm a half blood…my mum was at Hogwarts but she never really talked about it. I know she was in Ravenclaw." Severus shrugged and glanced back out the window as he had been before Remus had joined him. Severus noticed his parents had already left which hadn't surprised him but he wished they would have given up arguing just for the moment so they could see him off. Remus seemed to notice the discomfort in the topic of his parents and family so he tried a different approach to keep the conversation going.

"Do you want to be in Ravenclaw? Or do you have another house in mind?" Severus looked back at Remus and frowned a bit, confused as to why Remus still wanted to talk to him.

"Um…I'm not really sure, I guess. Ravenclaw would be nice but I don't know if I'm smart enough for that." Severus shrugged and studied Remus closely, hardly catching how he was talking about what house he would like to be in. Remus, he was starting to notice, wasn't too far off from himself in what he was wearing. They both had older, more ragged clothes on and a jacket that was about a size or two too big for him. His hair was a little unkempt but nonetheless, he was cheerful and happy and Severus didn't really know when he'd seen someone besides Lily who was that happy.

"I would be happy with any of them, really. Just really glad to actually be going to Hogwarts," Remus finished, Severus coming back to his senses and nodding slowly.

Throughout the remainder of the trip, they chatted lightly about school, what they were excited about, what class they were going to enjoy the most, and everything in between. About halfway through, Lily Evans came walking through to their compartment with another girl trailing behind, a smile on her face as she opened the door to say hello. Remus introduced himself to her and they chatted for a while before she turned and left, explaining she wanted to go put her robes on before they arrived at the station.

Remus noticed as she walked off, Severus looked after her and as soon as he noticed Severus noticed his staring, he quickly looked out the window, watching the scenery roll by.

After arriving at the Hogsmede station, they both stuck fairly close together and traveled up to the castle together. Remus being sorted into Gryffindor, Severus into Slytherin, Remus didn't think the houses they'd been assigned would have much of an influence on them being friends. Due to the rushing of the new year, of the beginning of the journey, Remus decided he'd wait until the next day before he spoke to Severus again and to see when they could spend time together, hoping he'd actually found a friend he could confide in.

Over the first year of Remus and Severus' journey through Hogwarts, they grew closer as friends, spending time together in the library, helping each other with homework, the pair of them growing close to Lily Evans, the pair of them agreeing she was the first person to ever truly show kindness to them. Their friendship grew and they learned to adapt though having rival houses and both pushed the snide comments of their friendship away from fellow house members. Their first year at Hogwarts was simple, they settled on a strong acquaintance, and both truly enjoyed each other's company.

Their second year was as vaguely familiar as the first one. They didn't stay in touch over the summer holidays but as they met each other in the fall at King's Cross Station, the more bold and eccentric Remus greeted Severus with a hug and a grin, quickly asking how his summer had gone. Severus had noticed then that Remus looked a bit tired, dark circles around his eyes and there was a cut on his face. Remus assured Severus it was just an accident he'd had and Severus finally complied to it before explaining his summer was fine, failing to mention his parents' further issues with each other.

As they began their second year at Hogwarts, Remus began developing more acquaintanceships with his fellow Gryffindor dorm mates. Sirius Black and James Potter were the two students he'd seen his previous year making a loud scene on his first ride on Hogwarts Express and Remus had learned they were just as whenever he shared their dorm with them. Peter Pettigrew tagged along with them and was more like a servant for them than a friend, as Severus pointed out to Remus, but Remus had seen them include Peter in several activities they could have disregarded him from. Remus still kept to Severus, though, finding his calm and quiet company more of his style and a much needed relief from the rowdiness of his fellow Gryffindors. Remus carried his secret, though, and still refused to tell anyone, though he felt as though he wanted to tell Severus soon. Yet, another year came and went and he had never gotten around to it.

Over the summer break between years two and three, Severus actually sent Remus a letter, just a simple question on Charms homework, but had taken the effort to ask Remus how he'd been doing. Remus was somewhat thrilled to receive the letter and he took no time to reply quickly and send the letter back, hoping for another quick reply. Soon, one letter a week turned into three and one page letters turned to four. They had made a plan to go to Diagon Alley together and purchase their books together, giving them time to meet up.

Severus came to their meeting alone, his mother having given him enough money for what he needed and Remus' parents had no problem taking on the responsibility of watching both teenagers while Remus offered to use his remaining allowance to buy them both ice creams. Their friendship took a turn then, Remus bringing Severus to chat with him, to open up conversation, to confide in him. Their visit was cut short, though, when Severus' mother showed up to collect him, not speaking to any of the other three as she beckoned Severus away.

Their third year at Hogwarts brought more trouble than either of them had bargained for and they both began to get more into their friendships of their other house members. Severus had began to grow to a negative attitude towards the other houses, feeling just a bit more superior to them. Lupin began to cause trouble with Sirius and James, earning himself his first handful of weekend detentions during the years duration. Severus noticed this after a while and decided to approach him, curious as to if they were still going to be friends because they hadn't really spoken and, "Potter and Black don't really like me, they might not like you hanging out with me."

"Nah, don't worry about them," Remus assured Severus with a smile, patting his shoulder, "I promise, I'll still be your friend. Nothing will make me stop being your friend."

Severus nodded slowly at this and Remus pouted a bit, poking Severus' chest a bit, "Hey…smile, okay? I promise I'll be your friend still. Why don't we go down to the boathouse and work on some homework down there? We won't have to deal with anyone else and I could seriously use some help on my Potions essay. You're really good at those."

That night, Severus met Lupin down at the boathouse after classes and before dinner and they worked on work together. Severus was amazed at how peaceful it was and sort of wished it never really ended like this. For the next few weeks, this was something they did almost every single day. With James and Sirius juggling Quiddich practice, Remus felt no shame in sneaking off and spending time with Severus who was beginning to open up more and more about his emotions and began discussing things other than school.

"My parents sort of fight quite a bit," Severus said one day as they talked about how the pair of them came from more poor and run down families, "My mum doesn't try very hard and my dad doesn't understand the magic world very much. I don't know why they don't leave each other already. They're nothing like your parents."

"I'm sorry about that," Remus mumbled quietly, wondering if he could tell his secret…but no, he couldn't possibly. Severus would never speak to him again.

"Yeah…that's why Lily was my first friend. I remember her sister being really mean towards her and I one day, but Lily was just as kind as ever about it." Severus trailed off and looked over the lake, tearing his eyes from Remus. Remus noticed the blatant avoidance and he tilted his head, curious.

"Can I ask you something, Sev? Do you… _like_ Lily Evans? I mean… _like like_ her?" The question caused Severus to blush madly and he felt his eyes widen as he glanced at Remus, shaking his head quickly.

"N-no! No, of course not. I don't like her, not like that, not at all. She's just a good friend. I mean, she's great but I don't like _her._ " There was a way he drew out the last word that made Remus smile, leaning forward and looking at Severus curiously.

" _Her?_ Well if you don't like _her_ then who do you like?" At this, Severus blushed harder and he turned to his bag, started to stuff his belongings back in it, starting to feel upset they'd had the conversation in the first place.

"Wait," Remus said quickly, watching him, "Sev, don't run away. Tell me! It's okay, I promise I won't tell a soul, I can keep a secret!" And that he could. But when Severus continued to ignore him and began standing up, he managed to push himself onto a knee and just barely grab Severus' hand, preventing him from walking away.

"Remus, stop," Severus whined, desperately trying to pull his hand back, "I don't want to tell you, you'll never speak to me again."

"What," Remus asked with a laugh, managing to stand up while maintaining a hold on Severus' hand, then frowning once he saw Severus looked rather upset, "Severus, come on. It's not like it has any effect on me either way, or us. I mean….is it James? Sirius? Both of them snore really loud, though, so I would take that in mind before perusing that—"

"It's you, now will you shut up and let me go?!" The words made Remus blink and sputter a bit, despite just having been joking very freely about Severus actually having a crush on someone. His grip loosened and as soon as it did, Severus turned and took off, leaving Remus to stand there alone, not sure what else to say on the matter at the moment. The rest of the day, Remus was rather quiet and didn't speak to anyone, simply going to bed as soon as he could and blocking out the rest of his friends, not bothering to answer any questions.

The next day, Remus had gotten up early and made his way to the library, knowing he'd find Severus down there working on his essays and assignments to get them finished early as he always did though it was a Sunday morning. He turned sharply down the isle Severus always had his things set up and when he spotted the older, glad no one else was around for Severus' sake, he strode straight up to him, pushed his chair back so Severus was angled right up towards him and he leaned down to press a deep, hard kiss to Severus' lips, not giving Severus a moment to speak.

Their kiss lasted a while and once he finally pulled away for a breath of air, Remus looked down at Severus and finally said, "That's what I think about that, thank you." Remus didn't think he'd ever seen Severus smile more.

The rest of the year, they'd spent their time quietly together and did their best to meet in secret, mostly Severus' idea as he genuinely didn't really like Sirius and James. Remus could understand that because they could be jerks sometimes and he complied with Severus' requests. Remus couldn't imagine anything better than his time with Severus. His only regret, the only thing he couldn't convince himself of was to burden Severus with his secret. He had things going so well. He didn't want to spoil that.

Towards the end of the year, though, getting closer to exam time, after one particularly hard month, James, Peter and Sirius sat Remus down in their dorm and explained they needed to speak with him. Remus knew what was coming and knew he would finally have to explain his relationship with Severus to them but to his surprise, they had brought up a much different subject.

"Mate," James started slowly, looking at Remus as though his dog had died and James was consulting him, "we notice you've been gone this past week and….the month before that…and months and months repeatedly before that."

Remus had a painful sinking feeling in his chest and he felt the color drain from his face, wondering if they were truly getting at what he was expecting. "Yeah….I told you guys why I was gone…"

"You weren't exactly being honest, though," Sirius said with a raised brow, "We figured there's not really any way you'd have that many issues going on. And this is only our third year but we noticed the pattern…and we sort of worked out what was going on…."

Remus bit his lip hard and he quickly looked down at his hands, taking a slow breath, "So…are you guys going to stop talking to me? I can talk to Dumbledore and have him find me a separate room elsewhere in the castle….I understand if you don't want me sharing a room with you. I do—"

"Are you mad," Sirius said with a soft, light hearted laugh, "we don't want that, mate. Bloody hell…it's not like you're contagious or anything. I mean…not unless you wanted to bite us but you've been going off when you turn, right? Away from people? So it's not like that'd ever happen."

"We don't want to understand and we won't pretend to understand what it's like," Peter said quickly, nodding rapidly, "But we do want you to know we're here for you and we're going to help you as much as we can. Okay?"

"Besides," James said with a now cocky grin, "Not every day you get to say one of your best mates is a werewolf now, is it?"

This caused Remus to break out into a wide grin even though fighting off fearful tears and he laughed shakily. "Do you guys mean it? Really?"

"Duh," Sirius said with a grin, "We're going to do some research and see if there's anything we can do to help you furthermore."

The rest of the year, the group founded a name for themselves and the Marauders worked endlessly on finding a way to help Remus through his changes when they came. And soon, they managed to obtain the Animagus spell, deciding to work every waking hour possible to perfect it. By the next year, Mooney, Padfoot, Wormtail and Prongs had all managed to control the transformation enough that being with Remus during his transformations and Remus had never felt more at home than he had in that year.


End file.
